Saturday, 5 March 2016

Bi-Centenary Year {The Not So Secret Diaries} / Memories

Just a few of my Diaries, Note Books and Journals over the years

Have you ever kept a Diary or a Journal? Did you confide your deepest, heartfelt secrets to those pages or was it more a record of what went on each day?

When I was a young mother I always had one on the go because I wanted to have a record of things I knew I would forget. What life was like back when. What my children were like when they were babies and toddlers. What we spent our days doing, what our routines were, their's and my milestones.

Alas, I was never very successful. I always started out with the best intentions, but, like most young mothers, by the time the day ended and everyone was watered, fed, bathed and bedded down for the night, I barely had enough energy to crawl into my bed let alone write up what had happened during the day. Some days I just wanted to forget!!!!

In all my attempts, I don't think I ever completed an entire years worth of diary entries. I tried, but some days were just blah....we got up, we had breakfast, we did the usual thing, we ate and we went to bed. Not much to tell. Then there would be those times when days would turn into weeks would turn into months would turn into years where I just plum forgot or just couldn't be bothered.

Sometimes it was a case of not being able to find where I'd put the blasted diary and so I'd start writing in just a notebook or something and then lose that!

Usually, by the time I found it again it would look something like this on. every. single. page!

For Christmas in 1987 I was given a Bicentennial Diary as my third child would be born in May 1988 and I was determined to be faithful and complete every day. Hmmm. How did that go? You may well ask. I did ok for part of the year but there are those pages where I would forget to complete the days entry and by the time I went back to it I'd forgotten what we did that day so there are more than just a few pages that simply say 'Not much today'.

Oh well, I tried. In my looking back at this diary, I did find some amusing entries though, as well as some disturbing ones, and here and there, some rather prophetic words, and of course there was a lot of things where I just went "I don't even remember that happening".

Here's a few samples.

January 20th 1988

The closer it gets to Kylie going to school (only two weeks) the more unsettled I feel. In one way I’m excited for her and in another way I feel frightened for her, and me. I’m frightened I’m, going to loose her and that she’ll grow up to fight and rebel against me. I love her so much I couldn’t stand that to happen.

How naive was I???

January 24th 1988
I think I’m coming up for about 24 weeks pregnant but I feel like I’ve been pregnant for 12 months! I can’t wait to have the baby but I don’t want it to go quickly because this will be the last time I ever have all these lovely feelings of the baby kicking and that.

I laughed out loud when I read this. After number three, came number four and number five!

February 3rd 1988
Kylie told me yesterday that it’s so annoying not to be able to read and write and I said that she would learn now she is at school (it’s was her first day) and she said ‘But it takes so long’. Talk about anxious to learn. I hope she always feels that way.

Nothings changed!

February 23rd 1988
Amy clung to me at Kindy again today. I had to prise her hands off me. She doesn’t cry or really seem to get upset. She just doesn’t want me to go.

The silent type. Never makes a fuss but get's the point across.

April 2nd 1988
Hemmed the new nappies and washed them.

'You what????' I hear you spluttering. You heard right! Mum's from my era will know all about it.

I have to share the last two for contrast...

May 31st 1988 (11 days old)
Ellise is really good, she just has a feed then goes to sleep. She sleeps from about 7pm till about 3.30 am has a feed then goes straight back to sleep.

30th November 1988 (6 months old)
Ellise wouldn’t go to sleep. She cried and cried. I finally had to rock her to sleep.

Good days and not so good days but oh what a journey.

Have you kept your old diaries and journals? Care to share any of the entries?

I'm off to read some more diaries from other years and find out what other not so secret secrets I can find.



No comments:

Post a Comment